doodles and babbles

Monday, September 18, 2006

Got home today with a heavy headache... dull pain all over my head specially at the nape area. Can't stare still and focus my eyes that much on things kasi lalo sumasakit. Parang gusto magpop out ng eyeballs ko. Ang saket. Kaya too bad, I wasn't able to attend our Youth Leaders' Meeting. Hinihintay ko pa naman din yun kasi it's one of my spiritual wellsprings. Stress lang siguro. Mostly psychological. May schedule na naman kasi akong magtraining tomorrow eh...

Di ko pala nakukuwento. I had my first training as a facilitator last week in the Service Architecture with the Arellano Nursing Students na nag-eexposure sa TMC. Kabado siyempre. Pero iniisip ko na lang na parang reporting lang ito...

Pero... hindi pa rin eh. Kasi, in college, when you report, you just deliver the information. Pero sa training, you don't just give them the information. You instill it to them. You help them chew it. You speak the words right from your heart, not just from your short term memory. Kaya hindi pa rin na-alis ang kaba. Kahit naattendan ko naman na yun, at nakita ko naman na siyang iconduct ng aming trainor talaga, iba pa rin pag idedeliver ko na.

Praise God it turned out well. Konti lang naman ang students. 10 lang sila kaya madali lang utuin--este, turuan. Hehe. Pero sadyang boring ang topic kaya kahit gaanong pilit ko silang gisingin sa pagtuturo ko, hindi pa rin mawala ang antok nila. I understand them. Super. Ganon din kasi ako eh. Bali, 2 hours yung lecture. Mabilis na yun. Kasi usually ang Service Architecture ay around 3 1/2 hours. Pero ayoko namang magtagal ng ganon. Nakakaawa naman yung mga students. Parehas lang ang attention span namin.

Haay. What stressed me out this morning was when i learned that I have another schedule of training tomorrow. Sa mga doctors' secretaries. Same topic. Pero, matatanda na mga 'to kaya ewan ko lang kung mabibilog ko ulo nila. Hehe. Pinanghahawakan ko nalang yung 1Tim 4:12 -- "Do not let anyone look down on you because you are young. But set an example to the believers in speech, in life, in faith, in love, and in purity." My confidence in not in my self. It is in the Lord.

Pero hindi pa nagtatapos 'don. Guess what kung ilan sila... tumatagingting na SINGKWENTA. 50. LIMANGPU. FIFTY. Kaya siguro sumakit ulo ko dahil dito.

Well, tingnan nalang natin bukas. Bibilisan ko lang. Brief but concise. Tutal, sabi naman ng senior trainor namin, ang kakain ng oras ay ang pagshe-share ng mga experiences. Since mga may edad na sila, mas marami silang mashe-share. Makikinig nalang ako. hehe. :D

O sha, hayun lang. Bihira na talaga ako makapag-post. Aaargh!!! I'm really crying out for one extra day sa isang linggo. 8 days a week!!! 8 days a week!!! 8 days a week!!! Haaaay... Buti sana kung puro work lang iniintindi ko. But I have responsibilites in our Chruch rin. Sa family and house rin. And most especially, sa spiritual life ko. I can't drop any of them. Iniisip ko nga, pag-ako naka-ipon na ng maganda ganda. Magbui-business nalang ako. Magtatayo ako ng editing studio ko. Harhar. :D Taopos mas makakapagconcentrate na ako sa work ko sa Church and I'll have all the time to spend time alone with my Lord. Tutal, hindi naman talaga ako after sa top ng corporate ladder. Kung yun ang will ni Lord so be it. I'll try my best to accomplish it. pero ngayon, wala pa yun sa heart ko. Because for me, success is not money and fame and perfection and dreams coming true. Success is when you finish what the Lord wants you to do. When you accomplish His will. No matter what it is. To be a president of a company, to be a loving wife and mother, to be a person of influence... it doesn't matter. What matters is for us to do God's will. No more. No less. And we won't accomplish it unless we're walking along His path.

Kaya yung mga wala pang work jan, grab this time to seek God's will for your life. Boy, I tell you, life is TOO short! Not time to make petiks petiks. Seek God. Seek God's face. Seek His path. Seek His throne. "Seek Him while He may be found." Hindi naman kasi tayo pipilitin ni Lord eh. He will wait as He make ways para pansinin natin Siya. But He won't wait forever. That's the scary truth. That's why if you must decide, decide NOW.

O siya sige. Have a blessed week. Miss you all.

10:29 PM
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